i'm so f*in pissed. my bff is acting stank, n all my other so called friends have been put on the caution list. after this week i have had i have realized that not one person i call friend or even family for that matter talks 2 me outside of wanting me 2 do something. u call me ur friend because u want me 2 b there 4 u but when will u be there 4 me??? o well, f*k it all! i'm tired of ppl n their bull. tomorrow starts school for me (well actually 9hrs) and i am actually kind of sad 1 b/c i still don't have a car 2 b/c i don't have my books 3 b/c i feel like i am still trying 2 get ahead n something keeps pulling me back. today i heard an inspirational msg about how if it feels like u r struggling or something is pulling/holding u back its because the devil knows God has plans for ur life i'm gonna hold onto that like there is no 2moro n hopefully it will make this walk a little easier n help me 2 appreciate this journey. i love God no matter what its just that sometimes i wonder why i was place in this world with the family n friends i have. i sincerely hope n pray that 1 day i will find out that purpose until then i'm still just wandering along trying not 2 mess up 2 much.
today was not a good day 4 me, ppl say its b/c i allow my situations 2 affect me, so i've decided 2 say eff everybody n everything its all about me until i feel better. i used 2 always be concerned about others well being but since its not reciprocated eff them 2. i'm living and as i do i'm learning not to trust anyone with anything especially my heart and i'm loving from a distance now. TT4N
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